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Debtors

by The Long Haul

supported by
Michael F.
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Michael F. Dense and crushing hardcore with some intricate quirky snippets thrown in. A great listen; some serious energy here... Favorite track: Holes in the Ground, Bliss in the Skies.
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1.
Lenders 01:40
2.
Singing riddles and rhymes, appealing to flies they feed out the lies. How they prosper in shit and point to the sky, plead if I die. There’s hate sewn in the seeds they plant, with towering branches reaching out. The roots dig deep; make holes in the ground, Watch where you walk if you fall you might not get out. I’ll have mine, my right to die and not wonder a thing as to where the fuck I’ll be. Oh I’m told to keep in mind all the sins I left behind, Best kept remembered for we face them again at the end of the line? I am no saint nor sinner, the stories you read made my ears bleed, No saviour for sin, no bliss in the skies. Convert, control, suppress. There’s hate sewn in the seeds they plant, with towering branches reach higher and higher. The roots dig deep; make holes in the ground, Watch where you walk, if you fall you might not get out. I’m no saint nor sinner; the language you speak means nothing to me. I believe not fantasies nor lies, no saviour for sin no bliss in the skies. Singing riddles and rhymes, appealing to flies you feed out the lies. They prosper in shit; they point to the sky, plead if I die.
3.
My head’s been spinning so fast that it’s burning up, I scratched my skin through to the bone; your violence is in your silence. Turn your back on me; your cowardice is your strength. But it’s the easiest way to say goodbye. Fuck, it didn’t mean a thing; I’ll bury my head so deep in sand that I’ll be gone. And you won’t need to explain. So fucking worthless, every day’s the same and I don’t know what the fuck to do. I’ll be a dog you can train to lick your heels, I guess I’ll be anything you want because I don’t need my dignity nor self respect just to see through the day. The stench of our real selves is hidden by everyone else. I’ve been dreaming of ending wasted days and writing stupid words that mean that I can’t live. Cut the strings that keep me up because the ground has more for me and I won’t have to harbour my fears anymore. Don’t make progress, don’t move on. Don’t have feelings; they’ll eat your heart. Don’t share stories, don’t even talk, all that counts here is the way we look. Cut the strings that keep me up. We’re lost, we’ve been defeated by monotony; it firmly wrings us dry. Suffocated by a veil of hope, distraction lifts the weight from our shoulders but that weight will one day crush me, a bag of bones to drag me home. I write these words for permanence an illusion like all the rest. Constant flux, instant change, nothing here will stay the same. Alone I walk away from home, to retain my solitude, silence is real. Permanence presents an emptiness. I’ll be a dog you can train to lick your heels, I guess I’ll be anything you want because I don’t need my dignity nor self respect just to see the day. The stench of our real selves is hidden by everyone else. I need to forget this.
4.
Blank Canvas 05:07
I stare on down from the top of the sky, I sit and wait for the right time to fly. With all the wonder of a child young and pure, I'll take a step and I'll fall, my body hits the floor. They don’t come near me, I won’t approach them, There are things that happen here and nobody knows them. I locked all the doors, I kept myself away, I feared what wasn’t there and I couldn’t hold onto my hate. I used all the words I had to describe what was real, But it left me speechless, each word I wrote cut holes into my skin. But these words had value, they told me who I could be, My vision was blurred, so I’m stuck in the same skin. I gave up trying when the rain started falling, I felt myself fall down with it. Now I’m lying surrounded by mess staring back where I once stood. My body’s broken so I can’t move, forced to see what should have been. I gave up trying when the rain started falling, I felt myself fall down and land with it. I can’t let go of this weight that’s on my mind. The conversations that we had painted canvases with colours fluid and bright, after we finished our perfect work of art you set it alight. So deep burning love this is your voice, your ignition blew pieces of me onto the wall, as I fall to my knees to collect parts of my flesh you use my body as a platform; you escape this mess. And now my feelings inside where the light can't get in, It has a hand, it has a grasp, it pulls me down.
5.
Debtors 03:57
You were sick and weak but wanted control; your own body wouldn’t do what it was told. So you created something bigger than that, to enforce a law, the be all and end all of us. I see no value, I see no truth. Just an image of something that looks good for the sick and weak and tired of life; death welcomes you with arms warmer than mine. Now we struggle as we suppress the drives that make us what we are and thrive to live for something made of disease, enforced by the sick and driven through us like a knife to the eye, blinding us of truth. Instead we live on collapsing foundations built by men with an eye for control but a body waiting to snap. The herd can sit and wait for their end (as if there’s anything more), it all means the same; they just don’t know how to live. Self-control, self-belief, I will not reject my humanity. I see no value, I see no truth. Just an image of something that looks good for the sick and weak and tired of life; death welcomes you with arms warmer than mine. Nailed like that to your cross you have no hands to write you have no feet to walk.
6.
I’m done with nostalgia and all this regret, It’s been grinding my bones, it shortens my breath. I look ahead to the time I can truthfully say that I have forgotten this secret, I can stand, walk away. I gave myself these insecurities; they ruined parts of my mind. I’ve wasted so much fucking time inside because I can’t figure out how to live my life. There must be something wrong with me. My failure leaves me scratching, begging for more. It’s getting hard to start again all the time my habits bring the worst out in me. They fucking take take take I can’t give anymore. You want the worst from me I couldn’t prove anything; I didn’t know what to say. If there’s more of these cold and rusty nails digging into me, if there’s more that I can find in myself I’ll be the first to smile. My failure leaves me scratching, begging for more.

credits

released February 6, 2012

All songs written and recorded by The Long Haul.
Recorded & mixed by Lewis Johns at The Ranch Production House.
Mastered by Alan Douches at West West Side Music.

Tangled Talk Records 2012.

Buy a physical copy here: store.tangledtalk.com/products/502362-the-long-haul-debtors

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The Long Haul Southampton, UK

Heavy music from Southampton.

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